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LAPWJPTFBOTCBRTEI & PWCTTELWMTTSMNOIA

I thought I would take a little time out of this 30 day journey to talk about a couple types of grocery store customers who completely suck. Yeah, I know it’s not a good idea to bitch about the place you work on your blog, but I know I won’t be at this job for more than five or six months so I’m going to take my chances.

Number one: Lazy ass people who just put their full basket on the conveyor belt rather than emptying it (LAPWJPTFBOTCBRTEI). What the hell? I thought this was a lazy act before I ever worked at a grocery store and now that I have to empty the things? Well, let’s just say some bread may be squished in transit from that basket to the shopping bag*. I mean, come on! Chances are that you’re going to be standing in line for a couple minutes anyway so why not take that time to EMPTY YOUR BASKET, LAPWJPTFBOTCBRTEI. I can’t see everything in there right away so it makes it hard to efficiently pack the bags and when you’re short like me it’s actually really awkward to reach in to get the groceries out. Oh! And those of you who leave your wallets and keys in there for me to hand to you? Holy frack you are lucky that I don’t throw the damn things right in your lazy face. I should add that if someone that was elderly or impaired in some way came through and didn’t empty their basket I would be totally fine with that. But. But! Guess how many elderly or impaired people have done this. Guess! None! I’ve had people come through who were blind, in wheel chairs and pushing walkers who actually take the time to empty their baskets. Do you even know how much lazier that makes you LAPWJPTFBOTCBRTEI? Ridiculously so, that’s how much!

Number two: People who come through the express lane with more than the specified maximum number of items allowed (PWCTTELWMTTSMNOIA). What is wrong with you? Every grocery store has an express lane and they’re generally located in the same spot in all stores. I get it. You see the short, quick line and think you’re in a rush and can’t wait. You’re special aren’t you, PWCTTELWMTTSMNOIA. So you take your full trolley/cart of groceries and go right in that express lane! Never mind that everyone around you only has a few things – you’re SPECIAL! Or maybe “you didn’t realize” it was 12 items or less. Well, like I said they are in pretty much the same place in pretty much every grocery store in existence so GET A CLUE ALREADY. Now I am not super strict on the 12 items (unlike the time I was made to go in a big line when I was only over by one, and some things were doubles of the same thing so technically I was well within the maximum number…) – 13, 15, maybe 18 things? Fine. But, when you start getting up into the 20’s it’s just not cool anymore, ok?

*I’ve only done it once and it was to a customer who, on top of not emptying his basket, didn’t feel it necessary to actually acknowledge that I was talking to him. Also, it felt really good. And if you are disgusted by my actions make sure never to ask what a co-worker of Andy (when we lived in QLD and he worked at a fish and chip shop) did to a customer’s burger when they were simply a bit rude to me at the photoshop I was working at. Trust me, you won’t want to know.

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4 Responses

  1. You’re a hoot!

  2. I was a grocery store clerk in high school. My pet peeve was the people who would set their money down on the counter rather than hand it to me. Picking up coins one at a time sucks–hand me the damn money!

  3. Hey, if you’re on the express lane and their order is too big and they are just jerkfaces, are you allowed to tell them to get into the other line?

  4. Thanks, mrtl!

    Sharkey, ack! Don’t even get me started on that one. I’ve always wanted to just take their change and chuck it down on the counter rather than giving it to them.

    cafrine, I am and if I notice they have too much before they start unloading I do, but thanks to my short factor most of the time I can’t see how much they have in there before it’s too late. Though how funny would it be to make them pack the trolley up again and move. Mwahahahaha.

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